It could be worse; you could be a mackem

By I bet I can pee higher than you
January 3 2006

Its not been easy of late being a Newcastle United fan, injuries, frankly bizarre tactics, a Christmas to forget (unless you count my x-box 360, which I am worryingly attached to for a middle aged bloke) no Santa has not been kind to the Geordie nation.

But wait.

Just before the queue starts to form upon the Tyne Bridge consider this for a moment.

Imagine if you had not by the good grace of god been born a Geordie?

Imagine through some freakish twist of faith you had been born unto the mackem community, imagine a lifetime of shuffling about and shagging yer whippet and most importantly imagine starting the New Year with 6 points, having arguably played most of your easier home games.

Imagine discussing relegation in August, where a season of achievement would have been to reach 20 points, now you would settle for double figures.

Alright I am not happy about all things toon at the moment, Owen’s foot being the latest in a long line of things that have me feeling slightly less than festive, but I just thank the god I don’t believe in for the privilege of not being a Mackem.

So its time for a deep breath now and say it loud:

Relegation, the gift that keeps giving.